Attitudes, strategies and looks from nights at Berghain, The Box and private parties that won't have a chance to turn you away.
by CRITTER | 20.10.2023
Let's be real. Where you party isn't that deep. You can meet the most exciting people at a bus stop and have the best nights of your life at a random house party of your best friend Lucy's cousin's place. The status game of where you spend your Saturday nights has become quite insane with people spending thousands of pounds on tables or flying to one specific party capital six times in order to try to get into one specific club. Truth be told, that's not how to have the best night of your life. At best, you get in and watch a spectacle, but as a CRITTER you expect more than that. Your Main Character Energy requires you to be part of it, and fully immerse yourself in the experience, right? So, money and possible connections aside - how do you get into any club and have the time of your life?
The best way to start your way into any club is a tiny bit of research. Especially if you are not a regular or have never been it makes sense to get a bit of an idea of what the place is about (you might not even like it!) Go online and check what the vibe is, what the event is called and who is playing. Clubs pay enormous amounts of money, time and effort on their vision to create a certain experience. They hire art directors, performers and even partygoers to make sure they provide their guests with a specific experience. So the best way to get them to let you in is by helping them bring their vision to life.
(Little side note here: the only part that people in t-shirts and basic jeans play in any curator's vision is as high-paying guests - so do better)
A place that masters the curation of a unique night out is the Box both in London and New York. Here the person on the door decides, who gets in easily and who has to pay the equivalent of a car for a table to get access. Inside all types of magical creatures are dancing surrounded by wealthy patrons who are sitting on tables behind a velvet rope. This type of place is definitely one where you want to show up looking like you just came from a magazine shoot. If you bring the vibe here, they might invite you back on a regular basis, drinks and table included.
Certain clubs have cultivated a cult following and a specific look that people stick to and embrace: most famously Berlin's Berghain. Any time of day when this techno temple is open you see endless queues of people dressed in black, standing silently with the hope to be among the few ones who don't get the dreaded 'Heute leider nicht'. There are plenty of online blogs and videos about its infamous dress code. Strangely, once you are inside it appears as if the monotonous black has been broken up by people who wear whatever they feel like. Obviously, obeying the styles and codes of a club can really help, but breaking them by showing up with a twist - be it a monochromatic look that isn't black or a lycra gown - can be your ticket in. There is something irresistible about standing in front of the bouncer, him looking you up and down and then giving you the nod yes because he is impressed by your subtle art of not giving a f***.
Clubs often are a microcosm of society or an idealised version thereof. Diversity plays a key part so the beauty of being there is that you realise that it is not about copying a specific look or being perfect in any way. In the best clubs, the crowds are not homogenous at all. They host all different characters: weird, gorgeous, old, young, fat, disabled, pregnant, ... you name it - they are there. Uniqueness is key here, so don't mess up your chances by showing up with five carbon copies of yourself. Be different and see the best in yourself as it allows everyone else to be at ease and fully enjoy themselves. You will see how magnetic you are when you even embrace your 'faults' and make them your best feature.
The main thing to get your way with anything in life is attitude. For some people it is a God-given gift, others have to work really hard on themselves to build up the confidence, charm and people skills to feign it, but it is an art form to make anything look like it's no big deal whilst staying likeable and making people see the most amazing person in you. It might take a couple of times to master it, but cultivating your attitude is like good education - it lasts a lifetime. Eventually, this attitude will allow you to walk past any busy private party - people being turned away for not being on the list - and you confidently say to yourself 'Challenge accepted'. You will then casually walk towards the gatekeeper and make a friend on the ten metres it takes to get there, who will tell you to mention 'Elliot' on the door. Doing just that you end up in a private part of the party making friends with some local celebrities and influencers drinking free cocktails and you will think to yourself 'Feels appropriate'.
This is exactly why CRITTER exists. It is this power to know you are a star when you show up for yourself. it is not about hiding behind a brand or a garment - but about showing yourself off. There is a guarantee that people will be intrigued and will want to know more about you when you show them the CRITTER attitude. No matter what body you inhabit, you should look and feel incredible. All pieces are designed to bring you that confidence and energy and have the night of your life.
Need more tips on how to get into any club? Here is a 12-point club infiltration checklist:
1. Research the event (check for DJs, vibes,
2. Reach out to people who go there and promoters on social media
3. Plan your outfit - know the dress code but put your own stink on it
4. Vibes! Get yourself in the right mood - but don't show up wasted
5. Squad goals! bring the right people who match your energy
(but don't be scared to go on your own)
6. Multidimensional deity: Makeup, hair, accessories, fragrance... Make an effort!
7. Chat with people in the queue and make friends - they might get you in
8. Be prepared: bring cigarettes, lighters (even if you don't smoke), tic tacs,
portable charger,... help someone in need out and make a new bff
9. Showtime! If by now you get to the bouncer on your own - be chilled, friendly
but neutral and wait. If they let you in right away - great!
10. Emergency plan: When you can tell they are not vibing with you try a very
calm 'I'm meeting my friend Martine - who is already inside.' The trick with any
made-up stories is to keep really calm, stay focused and say as little as possible.
As long as they don't believe you are trying to fool them, they are interested in
resolving most issues.
11. In case the bouncer at Berghain says no - leave and queue again.
Persistence pays off! And if not, find another place where you can shine all
night long.
12. have the night of your life!
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